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Jay's Site.com > Humor > Funny chats
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<matt> you could fit a carrot up that nose
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<CyberPunkWanabe> I broke my new stereo that I got after christmas cause I broke the one I got for christmas..
<CyberPunkWanabe> I shouldnt be allowed within 10 ft of electronics
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<+Thief> never pack when ur high..you get there u open your bag and nothing matches...all u have to wear is a hawaiian shirt, an oven mit + a lava lamp...the rest is filled with cookie dough + hot wheels trucks
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<iMike-> call tech support and be like yeah my friend stole windows 2000 from officemax and he burned it for me
<iMike-> and it's not working properly
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<DizzDvl> didja know that a bee's penis breaks off in the queen and she saves it for later?
<rabbit> saves it for later for what?
<DizzDvl> saves it for later when she needs to fertilize eggs
<MoouadDib> if the queen's next lover isn't as good she slaps him with the penis of previous lovers
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<Comarcracy> anyone know a good game for pc that is similar to gta?
<ircbuddy> GTA2
<ircbuddy> (You must have seen that coming...)
<Comarcracy> kinda, i didnt think anyone would say that since i was refering to all gta games...but expect the unexpected
<ircbuddy> Fair enough.
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<tch0rt> i dunno, at this point i know i cant go with balls any bigger
<tch0rt> the balls i have now are plenty big for my mouth
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<gaspumpXP> Man... what kind of RPG is this?? It won't let me rape the sheep...
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<eras3r> who the hell is digdug?
<element_a> he used to be an old video game
<element_a> then he mutated into an IRC user after someone stole his shovel
<element_a> tragic
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<TasseL> Miten saan tuon Saatanan Koneen, korppuaseman toimimaan? =D
<lakmus> TasseL: Ei saatanan koneet toimi koskaan.
<Infynitum> To unleash the Machinae Satanus thou shalt read thy unholy incantation know as the Dark Manual of the Unholy Board of Mothers.
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* Belinus molests jsmith102
* kronix molests jsmith102
<jsmith102> STOP MOLESTING ME FUCKERS
<Belinus> we love you jsmith102
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<@Elijah_Wood> when and on what channel are the academy awards on?
<@Antipothis> cadamy_awards
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<mxman> i think some people have non sensitive cocks
<spazzer> shit
<spazzer> you know its bad when your hand goes numb while you're pouding it
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<Vaelin> ah, see, now i'd like to be the kind of person who writes their own scripts.. i'm practically that sort of guy
<Vaelin> only i've got a lot less initiative, so i just sit there and say "i'd like to write my own scripts."
<Vaelin> and that is all i do towards learning to write my own scripts
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<Bloodshedder> HEY YOUR PENIS IS MISSING
<macvilewhore> HEY I FOUND IT
<macvilewhore> ITS IN YOUR ASS
<Bloodshedder> must be small, i don't feel a thing
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<Monkey> Won't you take me to Funky Town?
<triple6> I'm not going that way, sorry.
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<@[ben]> youd be suprised how many pancakes that mouth has masticated
<@[ben]> and yes, i spelt the last word right
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<Neon[UK]> this machine was built to be kept on
<kickthepc> to install 98 you need to reboot several times
<Neon[UK]> :|
<Neon[UK]> maybe if i reboot REALLY FAST
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<zuez> today by morning, while walking with carlos, a frind of mine, i saw the prostitute that made me lose my virginity like 7 months ago, it sucked.
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<@Mouring> "How many Monkeys does it take to run this company?"? "One, because you can get them to work for dirt cheap and they willwork 24/7."
<@RndPkt> There was an article in scientific america about some study of monkies.
<@RndPkt> Supposedly some art council in England paid for 3 monkeys and a computer and wanted to see what they did with it.
<@RndPkt> I guess they beat it with stones, peed on it and hit the S key a billion times.
<@Mouring> rnd, sounds like most end-users.
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<@[DO]-Fury-SLeep> fuck yes
<@[DO]-Fury-SLeep> my ace of base is done downloading
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<WiteRabit> the thing you gotta ask yourself is: do I really want snail shit on my face?
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hristney: Cheating is like masturbation. Feels good while you're doing it but once you're finished it only emphasizes how empty and shallow your life really is.
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<Ultra_Violet> Xero: I want to fuck your lesbian grand-mother with a dirty wooden spoon
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<skychic> how do you exit channels?
<anarch> use /quit
*** skychic has quit IRC (Quit: Leaving)
<anarch> heheh
*** skychic has joined ummies
<CrashCat> hmm, you must have missed a parameter
<CrashCat> try /quit ummies
<skychic> cheers!
*** skychic has quit IRC (Quit: ummies)
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<tiatoraasah> in my internet options where it says LAN settings...... should i have the checkbox of atutomatically detect settings clicked?
<Blue^BearMP> tiatoraasah - no, you should've checked the box saying i know i should format but i dont want to lose my pr0n
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<Farrod> garh, most evil code EVER: assign module_power2[9:0] = ((({10{ramped_tx_on}} & tx_on2[9:0]) |
<Farrod>? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?? ({10{ramped_rx_on}} & rx_on2[9:0]))
<Farrod>? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?? & block_enable_b[9:0]) | block_default_b[9:0];
<elvisW> i'll see your evil code and raise you useless error message of the week:
<elvisW> 08/08/2002 16:54:06 FATAL ERROR PANIC : General Protection Fault (3) at $001759E0
<elvisW> EAX=03205F94 EBX=00FD5CF4 ECX=DBB180AC EDX=67616D6A
<elvisW> ESP=0045E62C EBP=0045E64C ESI=000000B9 EDI=03205F94
<elvisW> --------------------------------------------------------------------
<elvisW>?? Unable to query the system log to give context.
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PunkRocks64: we watched Matrix 1 in chemistry today.
PunkRocks64: and you know how Morpheus says the beginning of the end was the creation of AI?
EventuallyAdonis: what about it?
PunkRocks64: he says basically that the what started the machines taking over was human's fascination with AI..
PunkRocks64: and.. have you noticed that like 99% of our population is infatuated with American Idol .........
EventuallyAdonis: that's deep
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<fantom> I'm going to play drinking games with tcpdump. what keyword should make me take a drink?
<rizzoh> tcp
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digitaltrip: http://old.jccc.net/acad/hr/jobs/02-401.htm
DotMtrx: 9.28 to stand there naked.
digitaltrip: yup
DotMtrx: Where is JCCC?
digitaltrip: the school I go to, hehe
digitaltrip: If you get the job remind me to drop my figure drawing course.
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